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Lucid Nightmares Are Always the Same

April 5, 2010

A lucid nightmare can be dreadfully real no matter how many times you’ve experienced one. Like a lucid dream, you know you’re dreaming, but everything you encounter seems confrontational and terrifying
 until you finally wake up. Until then, you remain aware that you’re in a dream, fearful of what lurks on every corner.

A full eight hours of sleep evoked the following dreams:

  • The lucid nightmare began with an imminent car accident involving my sisters and Fox. It’s always a dark road. The other car hit the passenger side door which sent us tumbling half a mile down onto someone’s front yard. While the car spun I told the girls it wasn’t real, but it didn’t stop them from screaming. Their bones began to snap and the back of my head was hot. “This is a dream,” I told myself. As I pulled myself from the wreckage I noticed we were on a residential street I didn’t recognize. The sight of their bodies was horrendous. I’ve had this nightmare so many times over the years and yet I still perform CPR in an attempt to save them. I wave my hand over their bodies and their eyes open. I think I’ve succeeded until I watch them change into dead children. My special abilities had failed. I ran down the empty street calling out for help, but it’s too quiet. My bare feet continued to hit the pavement. When it’s this quiet I know I’m in a nightmare. I saw light coming from a house and turned right. I ran past two open doors and received that familiar feeling again. This was an old childhood nightmare. I looked up and saw a banner of sky with thick clouds. Everything around it was black. Another signature of this type of dream. I took to the sky and looked down at the world below. Completely empty. I couldn’t even see the Land of the Dead.
  • After searching for some indication of life, I found a cabin and flew down to see who was there. Three men. The older men, tall and muscular, with thick mustaches didn’t speak. The hairless younger man with dark brown skin nodded and they ordered me to remove my clothing. When I refused they did it for me. I was held down while the younger man, sexually unprepared or perhaps impotent, kissed me. I tasted death on his tongue. Mothballs. He placed his hands over my rib cage and heaved his weight onto me. The sensation of sleep paralysis. I can’t breathe. My rib cage was going to shatter. I moved my head side to side, but he followed with his mouth and contaminated me with his deathly toxin. I woke up clutching at my ribs, afraid to go back to sleep.
  • Headed to the airport with Anne and the baby. I forgot my passport and a few other essentials because I’m preoccupied with the child’s safety.
  • On the set of Eclipse. Spoke to Stephanie Meyer about the dailies. Watched Robert Pattinson roam the set. Many scenes not found in the book were being shot changing the story dramatically.
  • Bartered my way into a private research institution. There was a woman authorized to issue certain books and publications. While she helped someone else I picked the lock to a set of white cabinets. I found a file for Allan Hobson. It contained several unpublished papers. My intention was to steal them.

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